Thursday, 14 May 2020

What kind of Optimism we need now?

In the last few articles I wrote on the Great Depression. It is somewhat negative energy. To clarify, I am not a pessimist. I am always labelled as an optimist by my friends and colleagues. I can be brutally honest, but I am a person with positive energy.


BE POSITIVE, THERE WILL BE SOLUTION

Three years ago, I posted the same article, “Why I am an Optimist?”.  There are two pictures of my youngest daughter. First picture is with her really natural-born curly bad hairdo and in the second picture, it was her with a neat and tied up hair. Apparently, I am inferring that even if you have a problem, stay optimistic and there will be ways to fix it. In this case, it was tying up her hair and it all looks good, despite the curly hair.

Although it is a good solution, but it is a not a permanent solution.


EVEN POSITIVENESS WILL NOT WORK?

My youngest daughter had natural-born curly hair. My wife and me both have straight hair, and we have no clue why she where she inherited the curly hair from. Every morning she will have a bad hairdo! 


Even if we try our best to take care of her hair, it will still be so curly and difficult to manage.

Many times at the mall, aunties will walk over and said,

“oh…. look at her hair, so cute! You perm her hair? ” One auntie even asked if “she was from Africa”?

While we burst into laughter but at the same time we were worry for her. This is especially so, when she reach adulthood with inferior complex on her hair. Afterall, girls tend to be prettier with straight silky hair, and not thick curly unmanageable hair.


ACCEPT THE PROBLEM, AND FOCUS ON OTHER GOOD THINGS

Then I also remember a friend who has curly hair all his life, and it is so curly that he need to cut “botak” all the time!  The thought of it scares us.

In any case, my wife and me accepted the problem and instead of focusing on her short-coming, we focus on building her character, and also there is her eyes, her brows and everything about her is so pretty except her hair!


DO NOT GIVE UP

At first, we were thinking to bring her to see doctor? Then we ponder if it is useful at all, because it is supposed to be genes right? Then we try to use special conditioner and also apply hair serum. It does not seem to work.

Running out of options, we tried a spiritual solution that always seems to work for us. We started praying for her. Her hair did not become straight after 1 year. Not after two years also!


We did not give up, and keeps on praying for her.

NOW….


All her new grown hair is soft and straight.


ROLF’S THOUGHTS

Many times in our life, we will encounter setbacks and obstacles. We suffered and became increasingly anxious. The immediate thing we will do is to wreck our heads for solution. In a state of anxiety, we will take countless actions, trying to use our own effort to resolve the problem. But there will be time when no matter how hard we try with the desire to solve the problem instantly, it just won’t work!

Patience, Perseverance and Endurance
The fact is we really need to calm down and exhibit Patience. Do nothing and without getting angry or upset for that moment. It may be at the time when we least expected where the solutions will become visible.

The sustainable solution is one that originates from our heart and is not evil.

Then we must Persevere with the solution. Keep doing it steadfastly and does not give up. It can be tough, and it may take years. We have to Endure. And may have to remain in the very difficult situation for some time. Do you know how to learn endurance? ENDURE!

Keep on the faith, the problem will be resolved eventually.  

Even if the problems is not resolved, we should stop being anxious, calm down and review it carefully. Once we quiet down, we may somehow realise that maybe the problem is not external. The root cause of the problem may just be none other than “ourselves”.

Perhaps the failure happens for a good reason to humble us, so that we can learn from it, turn over a new leaf and be stronger and wiser the next time.

Have the right kind of optimism

Last but not least, stay optimistic and be hopeful!

Bearing in mind that the “optimism” is not ignorant or baseless optimism caused by greed or self-interest or self-pleasure in an unrealistic manner. Repeat what the Americans did during the 1920s, will simply lead to a catastrophic ending.

Instead, it is the optimism coupled with humility, patience, hardwork, perseverance, endurance, preparedness, love, faith and hope that will prevail over the problems we faced.






9 comments:

  1. Cute daughter!
    It's Always Darkest Before the Dawn.
    Stay positive and I am sure we can all get through this together.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Value Warrior,
      Thank you for the compliments. Yes, it is always darkest b4 dawn, and sure there is light in the tunnel ahead.

      Delete
  2. Curly hair is cute and i don't agree that straight silky hair is prettier (that is what the media wants you to think). I'm Indian and our whole family had that kinda hair growing up and we are proud of it. It usually gets straight as you age anyway. That aside being optimistic is always good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Gad, yes, media influence us. Looks is in the eye of the beholder. It is surface. The beauty is in the inner self actually.

      Delete
  3. Hi Rolf,

    Like your message. My thinking is that after we do our best to stem the loss/prevent the loss/mitigate the difficulties, we should stay optimistic and let it ride through. No point worrying about it, AFTER you've done all you can.

    I think after having kids, my mental strength is stronger. Afterall, we have to be strong for them. It's also about the joy they have on the little things. Worry free :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi LP, my long time blog friend, tks for the msg. Tried our best, final outcome often beyond us n we have to adapt.

      Good parenting is probably harder than investing! Knew many rich and so-called successful n rich people in my circle, by today's standard. Parenting is their worst nightmare.

      Delete
  4. Quote : "if you have a problem, stay optimistic and there will be ways to fix it."

    If we can't fix it; we can try to mitigate it! Just don't give up!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi CW, yes. There will always be ways. Even without, then probably it was allowed to happen, and we have no choice but to adapt.

      Changing ourselves sometimes is more difficult than to change the situation. If we did that, the result may perhaps be better than the result we want from changing the situation.

      Time normally tell....

      Delete
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