Sunday, 3 January 2016

My Testimony for a fellow reader who is hospitalized

I am deeply saddened after hearing that a fellow reader who is currently sick-bedded in hospital. Hereby, I will like to extend my sincere prayers to her, hoping that she can be blessed with good health again. Instead of gushing words of condolences, I will share my personal testimony. Perhaps no words are more powerful than personal experience. I sincerely hope it can help her in one way or another.

My Testimony

More than seven years ago, I was hospitalized for approximately two weeks. It was a period when I supposedly shining both in my career and life. Yet, my health suffered more than just a slight glitch. Instead, it can be truly fatal if remedy comes late. I will likely say goodbye to this beautiful world with many bags of regrets!

I remember vividly receiving a call from my Family doctor who uttered in a wheezing tone that I had to be admitted to the hospital immediately. For a start, the daze and confusion overshadowed the fear. It was not only when I was waiting in the government hospital for hours before admission, that the fear becomes palpable, sending shivers down my spine. Thoughts of "Will I die?" keep racking my mind.

Once admitted, I was infused with pines of blood into my body, and had to go through many painful diagnostic tests to find the source of my problem. Worst of all, I was without food for days, just glucose Intravenous therapy. Just when all odds seem against me, somehow miraculously my fear and pain was later overcome and transformed into faith of recovery.

Why and how is this so? Perhaps the sickness is just a test in life or a test of my faith? 

Looking back, I attributed the recovery to:

1) The undivided care and support from my family especially my wife, and the frequent visits from relatives and friends providing strong support to my mental well-being.

2) The faith and belief that I am able to overcome my illness and not die at such a young age, especially when I still have so many things left unaccomplished in life.

3) The positive thinking that the illness may just be blessing in disguise to give me a well-deserved break from my very hectic work schedule. It could well also be a wake-up call, reminding that I must start living a healthier and a more balanced life.

While on the hospital bed, I always set my minds on all the happy things I am going to do once I am discharged. I forget everything about work, targets, deadlines etc. Let go....! 

Almost every night, my wife will after her working hours, accompanied me in the hospital to watch at least one episode of our favourite HK TVB serial from our own computer. It is like life as normal back at home with the good exception that I have no mandate whatsoever to be at office in the day!

In times when I am feeling better, I will chit chat with my hospital room-mates to pass time. I still remember there is this old roommate. Despite his uncontrollable poo that can stink the whole room, he will always give me a gentle wave and purified smile in the morning. His simple genuine gesture brightened my day much more than the poo that stink the room.

Because I am staying for a longer time in the hospital, I will witness roommates discharged one-by-one, while I am still bedridden. This is demoralizing! I devised that one very good way to alleviate this dejection is to feel happy for those being discharged and hope that they can grow healthier.  

I also take time to read beyond my work, something I had yet to do so, due to the lack of time back then. In particular, my former boss visited me, prayed for me and handed me a spiritual book to read. It is about divine healing. The inner peace generated from reading helps in my recovery too.

The old Mediacorp TV serials in the morning or late at night also provide me with a nostalgic sense of my happy childhood.

I was finally discharged when my blood level was out of the danger zone. After many tests, the doctors were still unable to find the cause for my problems. There is no firm diagnosis, although I was prescribed with medications.

With my loved ones around me, I continue to stay happy, positive and have total faith in my own recovery! And yes, I recovered fast.

Rolf’s Thoughts

Today, I have a strong belief that most illnesses are consequence of worries and fears. The worries and stresses accumulated from work and relationships; the fears of not having enough in life or not able to meet the expectations set in our life. The worries and fears often translate into anger, grudges and unhappiness which in a later stage develop into sickness in our body.   

Some people think that money is the solution to their problems. The poor often misunderstand that the rich has lesser problems than they do, and think that by being rich, all their problems including health issues will be eliminated. In fact, it is the opposite. For most rich people I know, they often have more serious and complicated problems. It is probably due to the egocentric behaviors that most wealthy people have, resulting in the reluctance to confess their mistakes, and to repent. Money is essentially the root of most problems since human evolution.

To end, I sincerely hope that anyone who encountered sickness can have faith in their recovery by staying positive and most importantly knowing and treasuring the fact that their loved ones will be always around them.

Hope my humble personal experience helps. Speedy Recovery! 


  1. Hi Rolf,

    I hoped she see this. Anxiety is Defintely one of the source of illness. The other being lifestyle and basically your karma...

    My mum lead a worries - free life at the later stage but still...

    Sources of illness might differ but a positive outlook will help, regardless, and will improve quality of life of sicken and those around.

    Hope she stay positive.

  2. Thank wow.
    Yes I am better today. That day was very worried as the doctor just told me that I might need dialysis.

    But today. My kidney function is improving. So I feel better.

    2 weeks is small issue to me. My best record is 2 month times in hospital. Yes. I blessed that my family, especially my husband 不离不弃。

    I am ok la. Still in hospital. Kicking hard. Now hospital got free wifi. Can watch online drama. So happy.

  3. Replies
    1. Respect belongs 100% to Yeh for I am sure she will be able to endure and overcome this difficult time.

      Look... she is already smiling and so happy!
      I am sure her smiles not just melt her husband heart! :-)

  4. Our lives are really fragile and unpredictable.
    No matter, we still should be able to celebrate life in any circumstances.

    My BIL has been battling stage 4 colon cancer for 4 to 5 years continuously already. And with no remission at all, he still can work part time and join us in normal activities.
    i don't know whether he suffers silently in the quiet, putting on a brave front for us.
    But i know many kin and friends think he doesn't look like a cancer patient most of the time.
    i think it is because he have come to terms with his cancer very early after confirmation by doctors.

    The Power of Positive thinking by Vincent Peales must be true for my BIL.

    1. Hi temperament,

      Thank u for the inspiring testimony of ur BIL.

      It is easier said than done to go through cancer at stage 4 and yet living as normal as it is.

      I had a close friend who lost one of his legs just few months after graduation. He could have fret and fume, and gf possibly left him then.

      Instead, he stay positive. Today he is married with a boy and another in the womb, live normally and also represent Singapore in ASEAN para-games few months ago.

      I am sure the emotional pain is enormous but these people are just inspirational.

  5. Hi Rolf,

    As usual, life is short #yolo... we should never take good health and good days for granted. Jiayou in this brand new year :)

    1. Hi Jes,

      Yes, be grateful of good health and spread the love to the one next to u and pass it on!

  6. hi rolf and all,

    i discharge from hospital and rest at home now:)

    thanks for concerns:)

    1. Hi Yeh,

      I am sure u had received an increased dose of love and care from ur closest one.

      I am proud and happy for u! Stay strong.

    2. ya lo.
      everybody is busy at work, except me. now everyday slack at home, watch online drama, monitor shares and nap.

  7. Hi Rolf

    Glad to know you and yeh have recovered. Cheers.

    Positive thinking is the best for all situations. May not help to cure, but it will help to feel better for sure.

    1. It will cure if your heart is right and faith is right too! :-)